Every time I pop in a DVD I have to suffer through the opening FBI warning, possibly the title of the manufacturer of the DVD, maybe the production company, ads about not stealing the movie, previews, etc. I will say up front, right now, in front of God and everyone: I’M SICK AND TIRED OF THOSE! Granted I can often either fast-forward through them, or I can skip them by pushing the various buttons on my remote. Sometimes the disc will allow me to do it, sometimes I just have to sit and suffer through the Interpol warning.

When I finally make it to the film, then I usually fast forward through the credits as 95% of the time nothing of interest is happening.

With “Knife in the Water” (from now on “KIW”) I did the same thing. Credits roll – time to fast-forward. Funny thing, though, is that I couldn’t. It was as if the DVD manufacturer said: “No, fella, you can’t fast-forward, fast-rewind, you’re stuck you SOB. You gotta WATCH IT!” So, okay, weird anomaly and off I go into this film.

The film is almost deceptively simple in its story telling. I, myself, am trying to write a script about a handful of soldiers in the Civil War and I keep thinking: “Oh, I need a “b” story. Oh, I need to break it out more. Can I keep the conflict up by just having them walk down a path? A road? What if I have someone follow them?” I’m so damn concerned with the conflict, I’m not taking into account the STORY.

And, again, “KIW” is a simple story: A older business man (wealthy journalist from the Netflix wrapper) and his young (hot) wife almost run down a hitch-hiker (a young Rutger Hauer type). After a few choice words the man throws the guy in the back of the car and takes him to the marina. Instead of letting him go (and a bit of foreshadowing on the string of “windshield wiper thefts” (no, I’m not kidding) – they invite the stranger onto the boat.

It isn’t long before they’re both strutting around like roosters with their plumage showing attempting to swing the attention of the fair gal. Stories are told, pick-up-sticks are played, boxing matches are listened to and a knife gets thrown about. Even though the young man doesn’t seem to know much about boats (and he lies about being able to swim), he’s able to climb up rigging and he knows what a “foc’sicle” (sic?) is – I have no idea. He also has a big ass knife (“BAK”).

As the pissing contests continue there is an attraction between the young wife and the young stranger but he equips himself well with his gallivanting around and learning boating skills and playing with his “BAK.”

As I’m watching this I know, you know, we ALL KNOW that something is going to happen. It just HAS to happen. At any moment. Someone will get stabbed, blood will spill, death will reign. It’ll be cool.

But they all seem to get along just fine until the inevitable pissing match begins and punches get thrown and young man’s “BAK” gets dropped in the water and then he gets thrown in, too.

Going on what was said earlier about young Rutger Hauer type not being able to swim – they dive in after him but can’t find him (a bouy hides our blond boy wonder). Thinking that he has drowned, the older man swims to shore to call the police and arrange a search party while the hot young wife sails about looking for the young man. When he swims to the boat (He can swim after all! Liar-liar pants on fire!) he observes her nekkid body and before you can say “avast ye matey” they’re making love like wild hyenas. Shot in a way that is so close-up as to make me want to turn away.

Then…I had to shut off my DVD player and stop watching for a little while. Well, the disc had just gotten to chapter 13 (or so I thought) and I was 1 hr and 20 minutes in and what could I possibly miss. A few hours later I turned on the DVD player and found that chapter 13 actually started about 1:13 minutes and I didn’t want to watch the past 7 or 8 minutes AGAIN (even though she is nekkid) but I couldn’t fast-forward either. So I bounced to chapter 14 which was 1:23 minutes in and what could I have missed in that 2 or 3 minutes. Answer: A HELLUVALOT!

When I bounced to Chapter 14 her husband stood on the dock waiting for her. Though he had swum to shore, he hadn’t bothered to call the police and he was “naked” as he told her, didn’t have the keys and GOD-A-MIGHTY (!) the damn windshield wipers had been stolen. So…where was he? Where did Rutger Hauer Type go? I know, he’s going to bust out any moment and kick old guy’s ass. He’s going to swim to shore and run away. He’s hiding in the foc’scle! He’s going to do…something…right? Well…I didn’t see him again and knew that in those 2 or 3 minutes SOMETHING must have happened.

So at work, I sat down and watched those three minutes to see where, after making-love and on their way back to shore, she slows the boat down and lets him off…that’s it.

Cut to the docks and the aforementioned theft of the windshield wipers and the hook up of the husband and wife.

They get into the car and the wife tells him exactly what happens. The blond boy hid by the buoy, swam to the boat, made mad passionate love to her and she let him go. Of course the husband doesn’t believe her. Assumes she’s making up a story to tell the cops, or something. Is even shocked that she would joke about something like that – because it’s totally unbelievable that she’d bump uglies with a Rutger Hauer type while he’s such a strapping stud.

As they leave the Marina a sign pointing to the police station 5km away gives them pause. Do they go to the police and tell their story? Do they go home and forget all about the boy? What do they do? Roman Polanski does the right thing and freezes on the car at the crossroads.

What I liked:

I continue to be amazed at how enthralled I can be in such simple stories with no huge cast of characters, no special effects, little (or no) nudity, etc. The film created a wonderfully suspenseful environment on a very small boat.

The acting was good, not great and the wealthy journalist came off more as dork than he probably should have.

The music score was great.

Polanski’s use of camerawork was excellent. His use of deep-focus (person directly in front of the camera is in focus as is the person 20 feet away) was stellar but not always perfect.

What I didn’t like:

Like I said before, the acting could have been better. I would have liked to have seen a bit more interaction between husband and wife before they picked up the hitch-hiker to see if there is any sort of character arc. Same with the strange boy.

I have to say I’m really tired of foreign films that dub every single voice, sound, sound effect. Granted, it would be EXTREMELY difficult to film on a 25 foot sail boat with water lapping, wind blowing, motorboat going by, etc. But the dialogue and all the sound-effects are dubbed through out the film always leaving everything to just be slightly “off” in my opinon.

Bottom line:

Good little suspenseful thriller. Amazing what you can do in one location with three actors.